Tomorrow I turn 26, and tonight I used my first wrinkle cream. It smells like old woman, and I felt a bit sad as I smeared its pinkness on my face and neck (musn't forget the neck!). 26 has been a significant age in my mind for years. It was the age by which I expected myself to have accomplished a whole range of things, and most of them are still far beyond my reach. So I don't anticipate tomorrow being a particularly special day. I will spend it working for 9 hours with people I barely know, and then I will come home to my empty apartment and have a half pint of Ben & Jerry's frozen yogurt as my cake. I will listen to nice voicemails from my parents and my Grandpa and Grandma which will make me teary, and I will feel like I need the wrinkle cream.
But last year I had a nearly perfect birthday. In fact, it may actually have been completely perfect. I was camping with Gym, April and Hosea in Big Sur. In the middle of the night, I got out of the tent to go to the bathroom and looked up through the Redwoods at the sky. It was filled with more stars then I thought existed. I woke Gym up and made him come out and look at them with me. It was one of the fullest moments of my life. That was how I turned 25. So I will gladly take this lonely birthday as the price for having been given that one.
2 comments:
We're not there with you, but you're not alone. We do love you.
Happy Birthday, Linz. Those of us in Kansas are thinking of you today. Unfortunately, we're also mailing your card today, so I'm guessing it won't miraculously make it to your mailbox before day's end.
After reading your entry, I'm struck by what a great writer you are. And whether or not you think you've accomplished what you wanted to by the age of 26, you have accomplished a lot.
To a 38-year-old who has never left the Midwest and was married straight out of college, your independence and courage is inspiring. Moving to the coast and travelling to London are wonderful adventures. I'm sure many more are to come.
Wrinkles or not, 26 is an age where you may not have what you thought, but you probably know what you want. That's half the battle. So celebrate!
Love, Andrea
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